CONVERSATION Vs ECONOMIC STANDING

“Conversation is inversely proportional to the Economic Standing”. This is a statement by SudhaMurthy (Chair Person of Infosys foundation) in her book “Wise and Otherwise”. She explains that when travel by bus, we quickly get into the conversation with the fellow passengers without any reservation. When we travel by First class on a train or traveling by air, the chances of conversation get reduced dramatically. So “Conversation is inversely proportional to the Economic Standing”.

Why it happens? It happens. It has happened for me. It’s happening for me. I’ll happen for me. All other remains the same, what prevents me to converse freely in a high economic standing area? Exactly I don’t know the reasons for it. Also, I am not able to find any supporting theory also. I just tried to list down the probable reasons.

• My ego level increases with higher economic standing. I don’t want to hurt my ego in terms of poor response, fault of intruding his/her privacy.
• I wish to show him/her that I am self-dependent and I have good work to do (which I may not have also)
• I become more and more cautious in higher economic standing which prevents me to broach with someone who is unknown.
• I don’t want to show any kind of my ignorance to him/her.
• I start wearing colored hats and colored glasses. It distorts what I communicate to others and what I perceive of others.
• Suddenly, I start valuing someone’s personal values greatly.
• Wise people talk less!!! I might have wrongly misconstrued this statement.

Still, I have not found out why all the above changes happen to me in a “high economic standing area”. If anyone knows that please let me know.

My Experience with Hair fall and Some Hair care tips:

Recently I have relocated from India to Saudi Arabia. My Arabian life has started in bad notes with the start of hair fall. It’s very severe that the rate is alarming. I am noticing my hair everywhere wash basin, bath room, bed, table and on my shoulders. What’s in this new place? Is it the dry weather? Is it the food? Is it the water? I’m perplexed.

The hair, which I have never bothered, became my obsession. The problems which have always heard from others became my moaning. The worthless became valuable. Hmm. The world is round.

My experience with hair fall is very unsatisfactory. It continues, it aggravates, and it jeers at me.

It’s a toughest problem with simple solutions. But all the solutions are uncertain! Unproven! A lot of brands are available in the market with different ingredients, forms and colors. Everyone claims the strong and healthy hair. But no claim is proven. Also, the entire hair care market is unorganized and there is no scientific method to treat the hair.

Rarely people take serious of other’s hair, including the doctors. Of course, the doctor whom I visited was bald and he was just to ask me to inform him, if I find any answer. May they have realized that not much could be done!! Everyone gives different suggestions like Amla Oil, Mustard oil with Jasmine, Bramhi Oil, Moisturizer and special hair oils. It’s very difficult to call which one to use. Here, I am mentioning some of the suggestion as below.

• Lemon cleanses the dandruff. Soak the hair in lemon for half-an-hour before bath.
• Egg-bath may be the immediate solution to prevent hair-fall. Soak the hair with beaten egg for half-an-hour before bath. Don’t remember to take bath in cold water. Otherwise it may become omlette. Egg supplies the protein for the hair.
• Protect the hair from the vagaries of the weather. Wearing a cap may help to certain extent.
• If the water is hard, try to avoid using that water for the head. If not, at least at the end of the bath, give a final rinse with the soft water.
• Avoid using hot water for head.

I am experimenting all of the above. But the problem is still continuing. So, after some time, I may reach a stage where I may not need to worry much on that. I might have lost everything.

P.S.

• The website www.indiaparenting.com gives a lot of tips not only on hair care but also on day-to-day issues.
• If you have valuable tips, please share with me.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

By 2020, India be a Developed Nation- Debate in Riyadh.

Yesterday (19/1/2006) I went to see a debate competition among Indian School Students in Riyadh. There were four schools. Each school was represented by a teacher and a student. The debate was organized by a Body of Indian community “SAMHATI”. It means integration. They have started this body to integrate the Indian community in Riyadh.

The topic for the Debate is “By 2020, India, a developed Nation!!” The dream of our Hon’ble President Dr. A.P.J.Abdulkalam! As usual, the event started as per Indian Standard Time. There was little delay in the start. Then, the Key note address! Then lighting of lamp of Knowledge! Then, few words by the chief guest!! The unwritten sequence of any event!! As it is little long from college days, these things are almost forgotten.

As the debate started, everyone was given time to present his/her points. Congrats to the teachers! The Students were talking better than the teachers!! It’s pride of the teachers. It should have been their coaching.

Even, I was thinking that what school students could talk on this subject. But to my surprise, they did well. The education has changed a lot. The secondary school students were talking about GDP, Sensex, Poverty, rural economy, service sector boom, missing of Industrial revolution, India –china comparisons and Unemployment Rate etc. It’s nice to hear about India, when we are away from India. I heard about Sensex only after I came out of Engineering. Here, I am seeing kids debating on Sensex. I was astonished when an 8th std. student handled the question on “how the Sensex boom is going to help Indian Rural economy”. He attempted so well that he was given the first prize. He got the claps of the audience for answering the question. Really a Budding star!

The topic is well balanced. Equally easy and difficult for the both the sides! For the opponent team it is easy that they have to simply point out the problems. Thanks to our media, it is being done very well by them. They have picked a lot from that. The difficulty for them is that they have to take a pessimistic outlook about the country. But fared well also. They went to the extent of presenting “Unity in Diversity” as “Confusion in diversity”.

The proponent team generally limited them to statistics on IT Industry, Top Indians in the world, Indian scientists in NASA and some Patriotic musings. The same old stories! But it’s easy for them to take an optimistic outlook

After the topic the next interesting thing was The Master of ceremony. He kept the debate alive. In between, there was a quiz on cricket also. One Interesting question was, “There was 10 ways a batsman could get out. Could anyone list them?”

HATS OFF TO SAMHATI!!!

What is Your Strength?

I have been asked several time this question, mostly in interviews. Recently I was asked by my manager on my first day of joining. Every time, I have bluffed some thing and escaped the situation.( I don’t know I have convinced them or not) . So, I have to find a convincing answer for this question….

Now let us come to the question. What is your strength? Let us not get into the definition of strength. With Commonsense, Not only the term “Strength” but also the purpose of the question is also understood broadly. So, forget the Oxford definition for strength.

I came to know from a HR guy that the purpose of asking this question is to find out how one knows about oneself. Should I know about me? Yes. The world says. But, to what extent it will be right. Sometimes I may think in someway about me, but others may not think in the same way … vice versa… Who is right? Is it me or others? or both.

With all this confusion, I started introspecting myself to identify my strength. Strength could be of in-born quality or from repeated practices. I have to identify that special quality/Skill/behaviour which is going to make me successful in life.

A lot of things started running into my mind like I am studious, I am hard working, I am disciplined, I am honest, I am aspiring,… the list is endless…

But I could not say all the above with 100 % assurance. Because, I am not always studious, I am not always disciplined, I am not always honest, and I am not always aspiring. ..

But majority of the times I am studious, I am hard working, I am disciplined, I am honest and I am aspiring….

So Studiousness, Hard work, Discipline in behaviour, hard working, honest, aspiring … could be my strength. Some are in-born and some are practiced...

But these are not unique qualities. Not convincing also. So I have to identify a unique strength.

If I were always studious, If I were always hard working, If I were always disciplined, If I were always honest and If I were always aspiring … then, it would have been unique.

I have to develop uniqueness by practising them rigourously (Could have been my new year resolution) or or at least I have to develop a unique answer such that it convinces others.

Hmm... I have to think differently… What is my strength?..

“What they don’t teach in any School: Insights from Rummy”.

Recently, I’m reading the book,”What they don’t teach in Harvard Business School”. I am not going to write the review on the book. But just want to relate my experience with a particular case in the book.

In the first chapter, the author is presenting “Golf-course Insight”. From the behaviour on the field, he explains the nature of the people. As I don’t understand much of the golf, I could not appreciate greatly about his observations. But I just want to do the same kind of study in my field of game. Mine is not an external one. It’s internal. It’s a card game, known as “Rummy” in the circle

About the game:

• Generally played by 6 to 8 People.
• Each game involves rounds of play and goes on till the last person remains in the game, while others get out of the game.
• Each game is played for 200 points. As one scores 200 or above, he exits the game as a loser. So, the objective of each round is scoring less or winning that round.
• Anyone can skip three rounds consecutively, if they feel the card is not good to get into the play. Score of 20 will be awarded for him for each skip.
• Every game involves some entry fee. That will be the prize money for the winner.
• If anyone gets out, he has the option of rejoining in the game, at the highest score of the remaining players; but he has to once again pay the entry fee.

Now, let us come to the point. What are the common behaviors?

Organizing the card on the hands:

• Everyone organizes 13 cards on their hand. Organizing the cards conveys a lot of message about their off-court behaviour also. Some people will hold the cards firmly. Some people hold the cards loosely and spend most of their time in interchanging their cards frequently between places. This behaviour directly relates to the level of confidence in the game and also in their attempts in life.

Body Language:

• Observing others body language is one of the necessary techniques to win the game. Because it gets information about the other’s cards. Some people will not communicate anything with their body language. Their body language will be the same what ever may be their position on the game. They look same whether they are winning or losing. These guys are very closed in nature; one can’t get much information about them unless they purposefully do it. They are very confident and convinced of what they are doing.
• On the other hand, some people will communicate a lot with their body language. It’s their nature. They couldn’t help it. Sometime the way they keep the cards reveals their position on the game. The common indication is talking during the game and the ray of happiness over their face. They don’t talk in tension. Tension comes whenever the points on the hand are higher. These guys are open in nature. They reveal their strength and weakness easily.
• Opposite to the reveal of body language, some reads it and take advantage of the positions. These guys are good in observation.

Time to release the card:

• In every move, one has to pick a card from the bundle and release one card to the bundle. The guys with better calculative mind release the cards very quickly. They are quick in calculating how a new card changes their position and the options of winning. These guys are analytical in nature.

Play/Skip:

• Some guys play only when they get safe cards on hand. They don’t take any risk in the game and skip the rounds, if the cards are not good. They have some criteria like minimum one joker and rummy. We could see that most of the time, these guys skipping the game instead of playing it. These kinds of guys are very patient enough to try anything new. Generally, they tend to accept the normal behaviour.

Rejoining:

• Some guys rejoin the game, even if the get out quickly. By rejoining they increase their stake in the game. But they one more chance to win the game. These guys are high risk takers. They try anything till last. They are persuasive in their attempts.

So, the list goes on like this. Hmm.. .I tried to observe the people. First lesson in the book.

Geographically branded "Barber Shops"!!!

Its quite few days that I have landed in "Hara" in Riyadh. The major population of this area is Expats, generally from Indian Sub-Continent(ISC), i.e, India, Pakistan and Bangladesh .

The area is so special that it represents true identity of Indian Sub-Continent (ISC) . The Indians, Bangladeshis and Pakistanis are living toghether... Here, its common to see Kashmiri Nan, Tamilnadu Idly-Sambar, Hydrabadi Tea stall, Pakistani roti and Bangladeshi sweets ... Geographical identity to the food!!! Ofcourse its common everywhere. Because some foods are special in some places.

But, the geographical identity doesn't stop with the restaurnats. It extends to the barber shops also , like TamilNadu Saloon, Bangladeshi Saloon, Turkey saloon and Pakistani saloon..... Whatz special with hair cut across the region? Is geographical name is meaningful for Saloons?

The obvious reason could be that the geographical identity attracts the expats from that area. For example, I wish to visit the Tamil Nadu Saloon rather than a Bangladeshi or Hydrabadi saloon. If I look further deep into why I attach the geogrphical identity to the hair-cut, I am coming out with the following:

• Everyone prefers talking(gossiping) in their mother tongue during hair-cut.
• Everyone feels comfort when a person of similar region is closerby.
• Everyone is more affectionated towards their native place rather than others.
• Everyone believes that hair-cut varies across the regions.
• Everyone doesn't want to take risk their style by doing hair-cut in unknown style.
• Everyone gives as much as importance to the hair-cut as food.

Is anything is left out?

The Greater Common good : Arundhathi Roy.

Its little late to write the review on that essay. But now only, I am reading . It's about Sardar Sarovar Project on Narmada Valley .

Let us not take the stand that whether we support the project or not. She is also not asking for that. She simply highlights the environmental and human cost being paid by the project. She has taken the "least studied aspect" in the "most studied project" in India as the subject issue for her thesis.

Look at the issue , Human and Environmental cost of a Dam ! Never be the part of Proejct feasibilty study and always be out of the scope of the project design. But still she could present enormous amount of data on the subject A lot of Data from a lot of sources !! She never fails to mention the source of the information. Mindblowing !!!

By taking this subject, she could not be emotional. Because it will be simply rejected as sympathetic writting. She could not be too straight on the issue, because it will look like a study report by a consultant. She could not leave much away from the facts. Because its a real story. She has balanced everything very well. It's emotional ! It's informative !! When I finished reading it, I could feel the impact on the issue.

Then, coming to the explanation of the subject issues like Irrigation system, canal design, power production and environmental sciences, even the expers could not have simplified so easy for the common men understanding. But Ms. Roy has kept it simple but lucid.

A must read . If you read it, if any dam is coming to your area, you will definitely fight against that.

Expat’s Nice Money !!!

This is a story based on real experiences. Its about ,generally how an expat Indian's life goes on in Gulf countries.

Mr.Gen is a mid-aged expat Indian. He had been invited by an Arab company to serve them. Happily, he bid farewell to his country astonishing the increased savings potential of the foreign offer. His new identity as “Expat Indian” surprised him, enthralled him and also frightened him.

In the foreign land, somehow the expats of same country, community gets together. Mr.Gen also joined the expat’s club. But, being a limited in their number and their choices, there is not much happenings in the expats group, except inviting each other for dinner.

Mr.Gen was explained the concept of “nice money” by their fellow group members. That is to earn “nice money” and return back. Nice money!! What’s nice of money or what the nice level of money is? Before coming here, Mr. Gen had not heard the word “nice money”. Till that money meant his salary, EMIs, living expenses and little savings. Even, the little savings was nice to him.

In the beginning, Mr.Gen got confused on the new concept. It took some time to understand the new walk of life. Slowly he got the crux of it and started liking it more and more. It is simply living minimal. Whatever the ways and means of saving money should be the way of life. Whether it is Accommodation, food, entertainment, transports or socializing doesn't matter. It should be cheap. What a Worthy idea! But there was/is only a thin line of difference from madness for money!!

But rarely, the madness of money is accepted and realized by expats. Generally, it is portrayed as sacrifice for his son’s education, daughter’s marriage, wife’s treatment etc. Greediness is hidden in the sacrifices. The present necessities are forgotten for future comforts. Carrer dreams were forgotten. Family bonds were broken. Parenthood was misunderstood. Togetherness was lost. The submissive calls of mind went unheard. Emotional needs were thrown outside. Mr.Gen is also not an exception. The “nice money” choked him also.

As time passes, the “nice money” started coming in. Mr.Gen continued buying a bungalow for his family, a sedan for his family, building the huge sum in bank deposits for their children’s future. It became very long that Mr.Gen started his new life .He went far away from his initial plan of returning back to his hometown in few years. Never it was comfortable for him to get away from chasing the nice money. Always there were uncertainities or sacrificies waiting for him. At last, when there are compulsions of age and mental strength, Mr.Gen got back to India.

In India, Mr.Gen saw the remnants of his nice money. There were big houses but with umcemented relationships. There was new car, but rarely places to go. There was enormous money, but it was too late to chase the dreams. He was continuously trying to search the niceties of the money he earned, money he saved. But fruitless efforts! It was too late, when he realized that the “nice money “was not nice. But he laughed. Because, now there are a lot more people, on the queue to chase the “nice money.”

A life of unwarranted sacrifices!! Its nice money!!!